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- November 24, 1993
-
- Senator Packwood's Top Ten Dating Tips
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- 10. Use the word "alleged" a lot
- 9. Two words: transparent pants
- 8. Practice before date by groping a sack of potatoes
- 7. Gerrymander her constituency (if you know what I mean)
- 6. Surefire holiday gag: Offer her a "Christmas Goose"
-
- *At this point, the Top Ten List display on the screen goes haywire, and Hal
- tells Dave to just continue reading the list, without the onscreen text*
-
- 5. Always wear thick rubber gloves when fondling radioactive material
-
- *Now, Hal puts up the blank Top Ten background, without any text*
-
- 4. Great opening line: "How would you like to be in my diary?"
-
- *Dave tells Hal to just fade to black, and they'll pretend they're on radio,
- and Hal does just that*
-
- 3. Pretend to get phone call, tell her it's the President, and he says it's
- vitally important that I put my hand on your thigh
- 2. Always make Lorena Bobbitt walk through metal detector
- 1. Chicks dig senators
-
- **BTW: This entire screw-up was entirely unintentional**
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-